Monday, March 17, 2014

Jail or Counseling, you decide!

As promised I am going to write about my shrink visit and I can say shrink b/c 1. I have a counseling degree and 2. I am depressed. LOL

Let me paint you the picture. I rolled up to the office and on the front door there was a green neon sign that said NO ONE UNDER THE AGE OF 18 ALLOWED. Okay did I not notice this the first time?

I walked in and signed in, the desk lady/medical assistant/not sure of proper title person had the personality of a wet cat. The lights were bright, you know like in offices where you feel like your eyes are going to burn or something.

There were more signs. I especially liked the one where I had to get a key to use the restroom. That made me feel like I had entered jail. I politely asked for the key and then saw this sign.

And NO I did NOT take any soap!! There were more signs outside, no cell phones, no food, yada yada yada!! I waited almost an hour and then was taken back to be weighed and seated. There was the door where the dr was and an old alarm clock radio sitting on a stool right beside the door. The cord was stretched as far as possible and the station was less than appealing. It was the doctor's way of keeping confidentiality so you couldn't hear the session going on at that moment. I think I would invest in a white noise machine instead. I kept thinking if I never even had anxiety before I sure do now!!!

I walked into the room, there she was sitting behind a desk with two chairs in front of it. Not a cozy environment, more like a place I expected to hear bad news. I told her about my meds she had me on and how sleepy they made me so she put me on something else. Then was ready to send me on my way. I asked her if I needed to talk to a counselor and she said no not yet that we had to treat my "fever" first then we could talk.

Yeah sounded amazing (sarcasm). Then she told me to write down things I wanted to change about myself. Well, the only problem is she had asked me to do this the week before so apparently someone wasn't very detailed on her case files.

All in all, I am going to try the new meds, find a GOOD counselor, and PRAY a lot!!

The best part was meeting up with a dear friend afterwards for brunch. She was so encouraging and helped me put things into perspective. If you consider my day to day there is no wonder I am struggling. I am learning so much about myself and the way God sees me, something that is hard. God sees us all the way we see our loved ones!! I just need to start giving myself some grace!

Here's to grace and tomorrows class (called RIPPED)! YIKES, I am scared (heck terrified) but I am getting up and doing it!!!! FitDana2014


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