Saturday, April 30, 2011

Listening to God!!!

I really can feel God showing me that I need to change my life and the way I live. I am sad to say that I am hesitant to do so and afraid even!!!

When I am scared to just trust in Him and believe that He will take care of all of my needs I look back on many of my own experiences. One in particular was dealing with tithing. As a teenager with a job I would tithe periodically. I wasn't the best at managing my checkbook and I worked at a bank..I know crazy!! I would always forget to put an entry into my checkbook and would end up asking my boss not to charge me the extra fees when I would end up bouncing a check. Neways I digress! So when I did tithe I would give everything I had in my account. It wasn't much but I did it anyways. And God would always come through for me! Either that morning my momma would leave me a 20 for gas or somehow I would end up with more money in my account! I always had more than I gave!!!

God has been leading me to change the way I live. You know the way most of us live...trying to achieve the "american dream". Gotta have the expensive car, big house, trendy clothes, best of everything!!!! It is the way we see things, right? I never even considered this until I watched a recent Oprah show about a film director who gave it all up b/c ultimately it didn't make him any happier to have MORE!!! I never even realized that this was the way I viewed success! It was not something that I thought about everyday, but when I looked at how I lived my life I realized that I sooo do this!!!

I have also been reading the book Crazy Love and that book really makes you think and then try to figure out if you have enough faith to love God in that crazy love kinda way!!!! It has me thinking do I have what it takes to ask God to send me?? To surrender completely to God's plan for my life? To not be selfish  and instead be willing to give up comfort, living near family, status quo, a roof over my head, too much food in my pantry, a bed to sleep on, a car to drive...I could go on and on and on!!! Am I willing to do what God wants me to love Him above all else and to love my neighbor like I love myself??? Think about that for a second!!! If you live for God then it shows, right? Right now if you looked at my life you would think I lived for food, television, internet, and myself!! If my favorite show is on tv I am either gonna record it or watch it. And yet when it comes to God I can't even pick up my bible and read His awesome perfect word!!

I realize that I don't have to sell my house and move to another country to fulfill God's plan, but I do realize that something is going to have to change or I am going to continue doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. Which is the definition of insanity!!!!! I want to be able to not only tell Noah to love God, but to show him how I love God!!! I want to be able to do what the book crazy love love even the ppl that I hate or don't like. To help the ppl that I am afraid of or give to ppl that aren't necessarily the "type" of ppl that you are "suppose" to give to!!! 

So yes God is talking to me and asking me a very important question. It is scary and my emotions and thoughts are going 90 to nothing. I have so much going on in my head and heart that I don't even think I could type it all out!!! I encourage you to read the book crazy love by Francis Chan if you have not read it!! It will change the way you look at life for sure.

I am not sure what God wants me to do. I have no idea, but I do know that He will take care of me and anything I do for Him is worth it.

"Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal."
~Matthew 6: 19-20

Monday, April 25, 2011

Easter Pics :D

Easter was AWESOME!!! Here is the link to fb for all the pics :D Just click HERE

Sunday, April 24, 2011

The Cross Ministry!!

First of all, HaPpY EaStEr!!!!!!!

Easter is not about bunnies and eggs, but I know y'all already knew that! It is about Jesus dying on the cross for our sins and rising up from the dead!! Jesus endured a horrible horrible death so that we may live. Last Sunday our pastor was talking about Jesus' crucifixion and he was very detailed and graphic. It is so hard to hear, but it needs to be heard. I just imagined sending Noah to do that and was in awe of God's love for us!!!!

In honor of Easter I would like to share a ministry with y'all that is near and dear to my heart. It is the Cross Ministry! In a nutshell, Todd's uncle read an email and was inspired to make crosses to give out (for free) for others to put in their yard as a witness for Christ. You would not believe the number of crosses that have been made so far and given out! It is on FIRE!!!! This past Sunday my dad, mom, and I handed out 200 crosses at my church! Then we were asked to bring 50 more by Wednesday :D

Here we are ready to hand out crosses!! My dad and I!!!
My super handsome daddy!!!!! Did you know that he makes the crosses?? He is quite the woodworker!!! He has been making crosses day and night trying to fulfill the orders!
My gorgeous Momma with me!! She has been helping my dad paint the crosses b/c like I said we are getting TONS of orders from Todd's uncle!

I just could not believe that everyone was taking a cross and telling me thank you! I was just sooo thankful that they were taking a cross. I could not stop saying thank you to them as they took a cross!! Now when I drive into town I see them in yards and my heart just smiles!!!

It is easy to get involved!! We are encouraging churches and others to make crosses and are willing to show you how and etc. If you want you can click HERE and visit the website for more information on how it all started and the progress!! The Cross Ministry is on facebook too, so click HERE for that :D

Thursday, April 21, 2011

Walkin buddies!!!

We have had a few walks around the hood with this little cutie pie and her momma!!
I think Noah really enjoys our walks! Especially with Brooklyn :D He just watches her and I am guessing he is just thinking 'wow, that girl sure is cute' :D My momma got him a hat while we were in St. Simons and he actually wore it for one of our walks! Needless to say he hasn't done soo great with it lately!

Brooklyn has a tricycle and it is really neat b/c it has a handle for mommy to help push and navigate!
I really enjoy our walks too! The mommys get to chat and the kids get to enjoy some fresh air.
Hopefully I will get Noah's 11 mos. post up soon! I cannot believe he is less than a month away from being ONE!!!!! We have his party invitations ready to send out YAY :D

Wishing everyone a Happy Easter! Please tune it for a special Easter post!!!

Monday, April 18, 2011

add on to confessional

I wrote a confessional this morning and left out something! Well it has been bugging me so I decided to write about it! A fellow blogger kinda wrote about the same thing a week or so ago and I was shocked to read that even she goes through what I go through. I have written about this topic before and I am sure I will write about it again. I hate to say it is depression b/c right now I feel it is more physical than emotional/mental for me. I have had depression/anxiety in the past, but lately I have just had my moments of feeling physically drained!!

Like today!!! Is it normal to have a few days where you just literally can't stand being in your own skin! It is frustrating b/c I HATE feeling this way!!!!! I want to be energetic and motivated and get things done and when I feel this way it just feels like I am trying to swim in mud! I can barely get anywhere and by the time I do I am too tired to do anything. It gets on my nerves! So I guess I get on my nerves!!!

I am not sure if it is hormone related or what...maybe! I know that sometimes you just need a break, but I am tired of feeling tired! Usually I feel this way alot, but the past month it went away and I had more days of energy and motivation. Now it is back and I am totally bummed b/c who knows when I will feel better! I guess I need to talk to a doctor and get some more bloodwork done. I have read somewhere that metformin can block B12...but not sure if that is true. There has to be something wrong b/c I am not sad... well I am sad that I have NO energy or motivations!! But I am not depressed like I have experienced in the past.

So now my confessional is complete!

My Confessional

Just put Noah down for a nap and preheated the oven! While the oven preheated I decided to catch up on my blog reading. One of my favs Katie had a confessional post this it inspired me!!! So here goes...

*It is 10:21 am and I am preheating my oven for a frozen pizza! Nope haven't had bkfast, yep still wanna lose wt.? Yep!  I know that eating a frozen pizza isn't gonna help with that goal. Do I care at the moment..NOPE!!! (and btw it was soooo good ) I made myself feel better by drinking a coke zero with it :D

*Noah turned 11 mos. old yesterday and I didn't get any pictures yet nor did I get any msrments for the baby book! Feeling pretty guilty...hoping I can make up for it today!!

*Noah has been feeding Maggie (our doggie) alot of puffs lately and I have not discouraged this at all. Then I realized that I should have b/c when I fed Noah bananas he proceded to feed Maggie some and she slobbered all over his hands and then he decided it was more fun to feed Maggie then himself! Is it bad that this doesn't really bother me and that I secretly think it is cute??

*Noah used my clothes this morning as his tissue...aka snot rag! I now have it all over me...guess I should change clothes after this post. Probably not gonna do it. He doesn't care and I don't plan on getting out today! Yeah I know I am gross!!  This is why I like to stay in my pjs all day. Yeah among other reasons. No really I wish the world was a pj wearing all the time kinda world. Where everyone wore comfy scrub like outfits everyday in various colors. That would be amazing!!! I am very sensitive to different fabrics and pretty much get in my comfy clothes as soon as I hit the door.

* Okay I can tell I have become a momma b/c all of my confessions seem to start with a certain name...NOAH!! I love that!! I was rocking to sleep for this nap this morning and I just love watching him snooze. I just feel like I could explode with love for that kid!! Yep I have become that person that talks about her son 24-7...and I am soo proud of it!!! I worked hard to get here!! Gonna enjoy it!

Well, that was refreshing!!! I am sure that is exactly what y'all wanted to read....haha!! Go ahead get it off your chest confess if you dare!!!!

Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Jekyll 2011

I had the BEST weekend with my momma and sissy!!! We went on a trip to Jekyll Island and we are now planning on making this a regular thing. First of all, let me say Jekyll Island ROCKS!!! It is sooo beautiful and not crowded at all. I felt so relaxed the entire time, which after having a sick baby boy for a few was just what I NEEDED!!

We left on Friday and headed out! I don't think we stopped talking the entire drive :D When we arrived we went to our hotel which was tucked away in between a bunch of nothing!! It was awesome!! There we were on the beach with nothing else around us! It was like we had our own private beach!!! We were able to check out the sights with my sister as an awesome tour guide. This girl knows all there is to know about Jekyll and St. Simons!! It was such a nice time and I will have to share the amazing pictures I got on another post!!

I soo missed my Noah bear and couldn't kiss him enough when we got back, but now I know that we all need a little time away as mommys. He did great with Todd all wkend. Todd is a rockin dad so I wasn't worried at all. Now I am back home and trying to get back into the swing of things. I wish I was still on Island time..haha!!!

Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Sick, Sick, Sick

Noah has been sick and is teething up a storm! Todd and I both are sick (I think we have allergy problems). It has been crazy!!! He is on all kinds of meds and the steroid is making him nuts. My sis told me that it did the same thing to her girls and I just can't wait to be done with that medicine!!! Today was crazy, Noah was fussy whether he was being held or not. Poor baby could not get comfortable and was in pain. I felt so helpless b/c I gave him his meds and would try and comfort him but I just wanted to take the pain away.

I am really hoping that tomorrow he will feel better b/c I hate this!!! And since he hasn't been feeling well I haven't been pushing baby food on him. Which makes me feel guilty b/c I wonder if I am doing the right thing. I always wonder that!! Do you ever feel like that? There are days when I feel confident and then I have days when I feel like I am the only one that didn't get the memo. Ya know?

Neways, please pray for Noah bear!! I am worried about him and this wkend my sis and I are taking my momma on a little trip :D I am excited about going but I just want Noah to feel better before I leave. It is going to be hard enough leaving him in general. But I always tell other mommas that it is okay to have time for yourself and it is good for you and the baby. So I am taking my own advice. Plus Todd is off of work so Noah will love being with his daddy! They have such a great bond and Todd is so good with Noah. He is patient and so sweet with him. Noah and I are blessed to have Todd!!!

Monday, April 4, 2011

Paint your ART out!!!

I was so excited when my friend Joni invited me to the Paint your ART out event a SGES (a local private school). It was great fun getting to paint and of course chat with these awesome women. I am hoping they turn this into a regular thing!!!
 We had so much fun!! I am rockin my NKOTB shirt :D hehe
Can you find me??? haha

Sunday, April 3, 2011

Vlog #2 = addicted to the webcam :D

Noah's first Vlog!!! Since Noah has been sick I have been trying to find new ways to entertain I decided to let him see himself on the webcam. Sorry the video ends suddenly, Noah hit a button and it stopped it :D He is such a cutie!!!
Okay me figuring out my webcam is probably a bad thing b/c I am getting addicted to using it! If I wouldn't have looked like death warmed over with greasy hair today I would have made a third vlog..haha!!!

This wkend has been full of giving meds, giving breathing treatments, and wiping my baby boy's runny nose ALOT!!! I am still a bit concerned about him b/c he doesn't seem to be getting any better. I am planning on calling the doctor Monday morning b/c I am not even gonna play with congestion.

We did however manage to get out for a lunch with my sissy and my neecy poos.
Anna Claire, Noah, and Carley :D They both really wanted to sit by Noah!! He is really loved!!! And they just mothered him like crazy!! Which was great b/c my sissy and I got to chat a bit before playing games with the girls.

Uh is 9:26 and Noah is crying...sick baby..gotta run!!!

Friday, April 1, 2011

First Video Blog = VLOG!

Well, here is my first VLOG!! It is harder to do a video than I am super shy so I am sure you can tell I am nervous! However, Maggie is the star on this one for sure.... Introducing....MAGGIE :D Enjoy!!!