Saturday, September 11, 2010

Advice for my sweet cuz!!! Maribeth this is for U girl!! Love U!!!

I really wanted to write an e-mail to my pg cousin and give her the DL on anything I learned during pregnancy and as a new mom. You know things that I am glad I now know just in case God decides that we will be blessed with another child one day...and things I wish I had known beforehand!! And yes they are my experiences and not everyone has the same remember these are mine..NO judgement y'all!!!

During Pregnancy!!!
  • Even though everyone encouraged me to eat anything and everything in sight b/c it was my only time that I could. I wish I would have realized that all those fried chicken fingers and hot fudge sundaes wouldn't just go to my tummy but also to my hips, butt, arms, legs, neck...need I say more!!!
  • Shopping for maternity clothes is super fun when you are first pregnant b/c you really aren't showing and you can fit into anything. Well, after all the ck fingers and sundaes you can't fit into anything and it is depressing to try on jeans and have them not go over your hips!! So enjoy trying them on at first but be prepared when you end up dreading getting more clothes by the end! Unless you are one of those genetically gifted women and only grow a belly!!! ( sooo jealous )
  • Sleeping in the last trimester is almost near impossible!!! If you aren't worrying about getting ready for baby you are having massive volcano-like heartburn or a case of insomnia!! And not to mention the million times you get up to go pee!! I had to leave the bathroom light on b/c one night I ran right into the wall and had a major bruise on my arm the next morning. I really do think this is God's way of preparing you for the NO sleep you will experience once the baby gets here!!
  • Be prepared to everyone to tell you that you are too small or too big!! You will never be what everyone wants you to be so don't stress. I did b/c ppl kept telling me how my tummy was small. I really think it was b/c the girls were so big you didn't notice my belly. I mean it had to be big I had an 8 lb 9 oz kid!!!!
  • Also be prepared to hear everyone's birth story!!! And while I should have listened I just couldn't wrap my brain around that during pregnancy. I should have listened and took notes.
  • Don't feel guilty if you don't do 'you know what ' during pregnancy! Your husband will be okay and you will make up for it later on..haha!!
  • Enjoy every second of being pregnant! I know the sick times are hard, the tired times are difficult, and the end of the pg days are crazy hard....but it is sooo worth it all!!!! Embrace the camera as a fellow blogger would say and capture every moment you will be glad you did!! Even when you weren't quite yet showing!!! I love seeing the pics of me at 7 or 8 wks pg and so proud of the little tummy I thought I had!!!
During Labor and After!!!!
  • Take a birthing class!!! You know the one where they teach you how to breath through the pain and give you tips! We didn't go b/c I just thought oh I can handle that....yeah....not a good idea. I could have used those tips!! Next time I plan on taking one!!!
  • And yes it DOES hurt!!! I knew this but never ever ever anticipated the pain!! It hit me hard and it may have been b/c I was induced, but I thought I was gonna die!! And all I could do was wiggle!! Don't be afraid to go ahead and ask for the epidural!!! I did and I don't regret it at all!!!!
  • Take a shower EVERY day at the end of the pregnancy b/c I skipped one day and that was the day they brought me in to the hospital to ck me and decided to keep me! My hair was so oily and yucky by the time I could shower I couldn't even get the grease out!!!
  • Don't stress over bringing too much to the hospital. I was worried I would look dumb if I brought this huge suitcase...but I am glad I did b/c I needed everything I brought!
  • If you have a c-section be prepared to sweat alot! I am not sure if this happens after a vaginal birth but the nights after the surgery I sweated like I was on fire! Which probably did not help the oily hair situation!!!
  • Okay this one could be in the pg one but kinda goes here too! I wish I had researched formulas. I just assumed I would wing it and try and breastfeed and see what happened. Well when latching wasn't happening the way I planned we had to supplement a little and we used a bottle!!! GASP!!! Yeah if you plan on breastfeeding don't do that even if ur breastfeeding consultant says it is okay. They can give you a syringe medicine like thingie and you can put formula in it and give it to baby that way!! Then nipple confusion (or in my case Noah really loved getting his food right away) doesn't set in.
  • Which leads me to this one!! A nurse brought me a nipple shield and we used it from the beginning and it was horrible b/c I could never get Noah to breastfeed without it. I wish the breast consultant would have been there and helped me do it without it at first.
  • Don't feel bad for taking the time right after your baby is born to nurse or spend time with him/her. The family will be okay if they have to wait an hour or so!! This is a precious time and you can never get that back!! I am glad we had some time to nurse Noah before the family came in to see him.
After Baby comes home!!!
  • Stay off of your feet as much as you can b/c they will swell. Mine were swollen more than when I was pg b/c I wouldn't sit down!!!
  • On breastfeeding. I rented a breastpump (then if you can't bf you can return it and not lose tons of $$)  and tried really hard to breastfeed, but it didn't work out! Don't beat urself up about it like I did. Noah is always in the high percentiles and he is on formula! So your child will be fine.
  • Everyone told me about the no sleep thing. Yeah I just thought nope I will have one of those kids that I have to wake up to eat! WRONG, haha!!! Be prepared to be so tired that you cry for no reason, wonder how in the world you are going to make it as a mommy, consider never having  any more kids, and forget to brush your teeth for several days in a row.
  • Also, be prepared that when you do get some sleep you will forget it all and want to have more kids right away..haha!!!
  • Remember diaper rash cream! I had like three bottles of it and totally forgot about it. Then Noah ended up with a sore bottom and it happened so fast that I was upset with myself for not noticing sooner. And a baby with a hurt bottom is no fun! It is hard to see them hurting.
  • I wish I had made tons of food and froze it before hand! It was really great that family and friends brought us dinner and lunch, but I wish I had made somethings too!! It would have helped me alot, b/c you are really just eating for energy and don't have time or care to cook or go and get food.
  • I learned that Noah slept better in the footy pjs with long sleeves! That way when he wiggled out of being swaddled he was still warm! I now have a sleep sack and I LOVE it!! I think they have some for newborns too!!!
  • Invest in the angel monitor it will be your best friend. And when you do put baby in the crib invest in a video monitor b/c it will then become your new best friend.
  • Don't stress if your child doesn't sleep like your friends child did or eat like your sisters child did. Your child is unique and will do his/her own thing. As long as they are happy and gaining wt don't fret.
  • Oh I almost forgot! MOMMY guilt!! Yep, it happens!! You feel guilty about everything. Am I doing this or that right? Am I giving enough? Am I a bad mommy for wanting to sleep and let others watch the baby! You are not btw!!! Go ahead and tell that mommy guilt to go away. Ask your hubs to help remind you that you are a great mommy and doing a great job. Todd does that even today and it helps snap me out of the mommy guilt rollercoaster.
  • Let others help!! I knew I would let others help, but when we got home I thought I had to do it ALL!!! And I wanted to do it all, but after such a major surgery I was wiped. Even when Noah slept I couldn't get comfortable b/c of my incision and so I don't think I slept at all for the first few weeks. I finally gave in and called Todd's mom to come and take a night shift. The sleep was heavenly and I awoke with new energy and could be better for Noah!
  • Get out of the house as soon as you can! Todd and I took Noah with us and went out for Japanese several times. It was nice to be out and I am sure if I didn't get out so soon I may have been more aprehensive about getting Noah out later on.
  • Let someone (like the grandparents) watch the baby and go out with the hubs for a date night...and soon. Just like the one before I think the sooner you do it the easier it will be. It is hard to leave at first and you will call a million times but it gets easier and you both need time together.
  • Take the time to enjoy it ALL! Even the 2 am feedings! I still take the time to just stare at Noah and absorb his cute little face in my memory. Take the time, slow down, and enjoy being a mommy!! Don't wish the time away even if you are desperate for sleep (haha can u see a trend with the sleep thing?)
  • Do not feel bad if some stranger asks to hold ur baby and you say NO!!! We had a waitress ask us to hold Noah the other day and we were like uh no he is eating. I mean, we didn't know her and I think it was really rude of her to even ask.
  • Be prepared to be all momma bear ready to protect and attack!!! I found myself always looking out for things to keep Noah safe like I was some FBI undercover agent. And somehow I grew a backbone too b/c when it comes to Noah I speak up!! Before I did not!!!
Well I hope you enjoyed the way I experienced being pregnant, giving birth,and bring home the most precious miracle ever!!!! I am so thankful for Noah! I still to this day am scared I am going to wake up and this will all be a dream. Oh I almost forgot! The sleep thing does get better! It may take 3 or so months but it does get better. Ppl told me that but I never believed it. Noah got up every 2 hours to eat!! Yep!!! Now he only gets up once at night...YAY!!!!!!!

Just remember these are the days you have waited for your entire life. Or atleast I did!!! I waited for so long and wanted to be a mommy so bad and things were still hard for me, so complain if you need to, ask for help too! Just b/c you may have dealt with IF doesn't mean you are super mommy!!! And yes if other mommys make it look easy, trust me if you were a fly on their wall you would see they have their moments too. We all do!!!

LIVE IT UP!!!!!!! And I cannot stress enough to slow down and take it all in! Take LOTS of pics, LOTS of video and take the time to take mental pictures of each moment!!! Just be in the moment!!!! I have so far and I am soooo glad I do that!!!

Okay gotta go and get some sleep! We are going to church tomorrow and so I need to be rested to praise the LORD for my sweet Noah!!! Night Night Y'all!!!


Melissa said...

I think your advice is right on!!

melonbelly said...

perfect! I am a new follower! Your pic of your precious baby drew me in! Can't wait to hear more from you! I am your newest follower.

Come on over!