Monday, June 7, 2010


We had our second doctor's visit today and Noah has gained a pound in two weeks!! :D He now weighs 9lbs and 13 oz!!! His umbilical cord was hanging on by a thread so the dr. pulled it off...which I was sooo glad b/c YUCK!!!! It still needs a bit of healing so now I just have to put neo on it and it should be all healed in no time! We discussed changing formulas b/c the past couple of days Noah has been super gassy and not feeling well. I hate it when he has gas b/c I know it hurts him and I can't make it go away! We tried gas drops, gripe water, moving his legs up and down like a bicycle motion...nothing helped!!! Now we are using a more sensitive formula.

And let me tell you I am having the worst time b/c I feel soooo guilty for not breastfeeding!!! I find myself wishing I would have just stuck with it longer, but I was just so I was EXHAUSTED!!! It has been hard to not want to kick myself about this and beat myself up! I feel so guilty!!!! MOM GUILT stinks!!!! Plus, it seems like everyone I know is breastfeeding. And I ran into a neighbor/friend the other day and she had the same problems I had, but stuck with it and is now breastfeeding successfully!!! So what do can I do to not be so bummed over this???

Okay now more focus on the most important lil' guy in my life!! He is 3 weeks old today. And I haven't been able to take a picture b/c we went to the doctor and it seems like I haven't had time to get one....and when I do have time he is sleeping and I want one when he is awake. Hopefully tomorrow I can get one ;D We took Noah out to eat again yesterday and then decided to go to wally world!!! I had a mini meltdown b/c of course once we got started shopping Noah got fussy and it was almost time for him to eat! Plus, you know how wally world is....TONS of ppl and I panicked! I kept thinking of germs and got into protective mommy mode! After Noah started crying I just pulled our buggy into a vacant isle and started feeding him. All I could think was I HAD to get out of here!!! Thankfully, Todd was chill and took Noah to the car to finish feeding him and I checked out!! Then I got to the car and cried!!! I know, I freaked out, but it was our first time really out and our first time that Noah was hungry and crying!!!! Well, after a few good tears and Todd calming me down I was fine.

Since I had calmed down we then went to Todd's work to show Noah off and get the rest of the stuff we didn't get to get at wally world. That trip was much better :D And of course, everyone loved seeing Noah!!! After we got home I was spent!!! And I had to wash my hair...dry my hair...and str8en my hair for the next day b/c we had an early doctor's appt. BTW it takes me 30 minutes to dry my that is why I have to do it the night before or it will not get done! I ended up just going to bed with wet hair b/c I just did not have the energy to dry my hair and do all the night feedings too. I was so glad that Todd split the night feedings up with me!!! This every two hour thing is for the birds!!!

Tonight I am all alone on the feedings and dreading it! Todd is working 14 tomorrow so I am sending him into the guest room so he can get some rest...I am sooo jealous!!!!! So that is what has been going on with me lately!!!


Melissa said...

Don't beat yourself up about the breastfeeding, Noah will be just fine on formula. I know breastmilk is better but sometimes it just doesn't work out. I couldn't breastfeed for medical reasons and I pumped for 4 weeks but thats all I could do. My daughter is now 19 months old and she survived on formula!!

The Patterson's said...

I'm so sorry that you are feeling guilty about not breastfeeding. Just know that Noah is getting all the nutrients he needs, and you don't need anymore things to stress about!

You have really been out and about - a lot more than I was when Drake was only 3 weeks old. Enjoy your time and take it slow. I remember going to bed at 7pm one night when my sister-in-law came over just because I was tired and knew I had to get up in the middle of the night. Take your time healing and just loving that baby boy of yours. Hope last night went well.

Carey and Jon said...

Aw, I know the emotions you are feeling. Just remember it's okay if he cries for a few minutes :) It's hard but try not to let it get to you too much.

Shelly said...

The every two hours will soon go to 3 then 4 and so on....hang in there! You sound like a wonder (yet tired) mom! :-)